I wish I were a dog, ’cause dogs can bark,

  when they get lonely, or it gets dark

They've got a tail, that they can wag,

  when they're excited, or they are glad

And dogs don't care, ’bout the government,

  they don't pay tax, they don't pay rent

No, dogs don't care ’bout the government,

 about the lies they tell and the money they spent

 They don't care... 

I wish I were a dog

Dogs are great, yes, dogs are grand,

  they'll lick their private parts, then lick your hand

They hate to wait, to defecate,

  they think your leg can procreate

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They don't care, they're disgusting,

  they're just not as bad, as the lot we voted in

Dogs are dogs, they’ve a good excuse,

  the government just ain’t no use

  They don’t care...

I wish I were a dog

Dogs are pals, dogs will play.

  They’ll chase a stick, if you throw the stick away

Sometimes they’ll sit, sometimes they’ll stay,

  Sometimes they’ll jump into the sea on a sunny day

Dogs will always tell the truth,

  ’cause you can’t lie, when you say woof, woof, woof.

Ain’t no dogs in the government, 

  ’cause dogs wouldn’t stand for parliament

For the lying, and the cheating, and the thievin’, 

  and the stealin’ they represent

Dogs must think we’re barking mad,

  to leave that lot of crooks in charge

  Even a cat would not be as bad…

I wish I were a dog.